You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
