We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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