Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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