I can't watch pbs sober anymore
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize