Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
