There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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