ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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