erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
