Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
