dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
