i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just had sex on a roof
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
