is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
