ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Randomize