You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
