I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
