Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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