I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
