Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
