ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
