How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
