There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Buhtt sex?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Even my vagina gasped.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Randomize
