There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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