Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
It's never too late to be topless.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
