The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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