Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
