is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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