Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
