The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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