this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
