She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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