Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
So much Jack, so little girl.
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