Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
