I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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