Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Randomize
