JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
My pussy is not your playground.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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