Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
only you would photoshop your dick
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
