Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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