So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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