doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
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