Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
