I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Randomize
