Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
