butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
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