I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
