I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
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