I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
