I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
tonight lets celebrate not being married
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
We are all done wearing pants today
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
