I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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