My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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