yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I think people are normalizing furries
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
