this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
